Monday, October 27, 2008

Opening and Letting Go

Essentially, the act of giving birth is one of opening and letting go.
The most obvious level where this takes place is the physical: the
cervix (mouth or opening of the uterus where the developing baby
resides) dilates so the baby can move down and out through the vagina.
More needs to open, though. The heart, so that unconditional love can
provide the faith, motivation and commitment to continue even when it
is very difficult. The mind, to even consider that it is possible that
something the size of a grapefruit can come out of something we
perceive as the size of walnut and also to imagine ourselves in the
role of parents, completely responsible for another human being whom
we have not even met before. One of my clients called this Opening the
Three H's: Head, Heart, Hoo-Hoo. Opening also takes place in the home,
family, to new activities such as changing diapers, information about
things you never knew existed, relationships and other changes.

Letting go is the first act of parenting when the baby enters the
world as a separate entity from his or her mother. Before that, it is
neccessary to let go of control and expectations to allow the powers
of labor do their work. In its strong effort to let go, the body
releases all manner of fluids: tears, sweat, amniotic fluid, blood,
urine, breast milk or colostrum and sometimes vomit. In labor, women
will often let go of politeness, held emotions, self-consciousness,
old hurts...Birth asks that women let go of who they were before, and
open to the person they are becoming. By letting go of how one thinks
things should be, it becomes possible to open to what is.

If we look to nature, as yoga suggests, we will witness just what to
do. When it's fruit is ripe, a tree releases it. It is simple. It is
no wonder the Buddha achieved instant enlightenment under the bodhi
tree and that the tree is a prominant symbol in many cultures.

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